Poetry? Yes. Poetic? Not so much.

I was an English major in college. Did you know that? Probably. I don't hide the fact that I am a grammar freak and that misspelled words and absurdly placed apostrophes raise my blood pressure. I refuse to use shorthand while texting (I mean really, is it SO much quicker to type u than it is to type you?) and I use capitalization and punctuation at ALL times--Facebook, a scribbled note to Matt, whatever. It's a standard I have.

As much as I was born to be an English major, there were some classes I didn't like. At all. Like poetry classes. I had a very good reason not to like poetry classes--I don't much care for poetry. There's some stuff out there I don't mind, of course. We had to memorize Rudyard Kipling's "If" in high school, and I believe it to be the sagest bit of rhyming advice I have ever heard. But most poetry, to me, is just silly and over-dramatic. (I'm sure someone out there is reacting to this statement the way I react when I see someone write there when they clearly mean their.)

However! As I thought about what kind of blog post I needed to write today, I realized that poetry is the perfect mechanism for getting everyone up to date on life for AAMEN. I speak specifically of that strange, random, efficient form of poetry, the haiku. A few haikus are all I need to get everyone in the loop!

Also, I still feel the need to make up for my slacker pace of blogging lately. So this post will have my FIRST EVER BLOG GIVEAWAY! Yahoo!!! Here's the plan. Comment on this blog and tell me which haiku you like the best. All comments posted by this coming Friday, March 4, at noon CST will be entered in a random drawing to win A FIVE DOLLAR SONIC GIFT CARD! Okay, so it's not a new car or a KitchenAid stand mixer, but give me a break. We're raising three kids here. Play your cards right, though, and that's an entire work week's worth of Happy Hour Route 44s!!

The nominees:

1. Aaron's cast is off!
It was earlier than planned.
So thrilled to be done.

2. Our church just turned one.
We had a celebration.
I love The Harbor!

3. Love Steven Tyler.
He and JLo saved Idol.
Still glad Paula's gone.

4. Abby's birthday looms.
Eight years old just can't be right.
What is she thinking?!

5. Matt loves his iPad.
Abby and I love it too.
We steal it. A lot.

6. Thin Mints are my joy.
Girl Scouts, why not sell year round?
Life would be perfect.

7. Facebook sucks my time.
I need status updates though!
Because I...um...well.

8. Annie is our dog.
Aaron thinks she is his toy.
Annie disagrees.

9. Toys blanket the floor.
Carpet's somewhere under there.
At least I think so.

10. It's March already!
March of Twenty-Eleven!
Wow, I feel so old.

Only the best for my boy

We've all heard it: No matter what great presents you get a baby, they only want to play wtih the box. I am here to tell you that it could not be more true.

Aaron is 9 months old now. Because he's still in his body cast, the easiest way to entertain him is to perch him in my lap, facing out, and hand him small toys to play with, one at a time. He plays, throws the toy on the floor when he's tired of it, and then I give him another. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

When we figured out this method, I went through the house, collecting all of the small, fun toys I could find and putting them in a bin. Then I went to the store and bought a few more small, bright toys so he'd have plenty of options. Of course, some toys get more attention than others depending on his mood, but there are several that I can depend on to keep him entertained the longest. They are:

- An empty water bottle
- The funnel drain attachment for my panini maker
- A gift bow from Christmas
- The foam keychain that came with his diaper bag
- A spoon
- The lids from several small Tupperware containers
- The DVD player remote
- A calculator

It's okay though! It makes getting his birthday present really easy. I'm just going to wrap up a few toilet paper tubes and a comb and call it a day.

Silver Linings To All This Snow

1. There's not nearly as much laundry to be done since no one's getting out of their pajamas.

2. It takes so much less to make people happy now--45 degrees and partly cloudy would be met with rejoicing in the streets.

3. Think of all the gas money being saved when you don't drive for 8 days.

4. If you haven't taken your outdoor Christmas lights down/trimmed your hedges/cleaned up your yard lately, no one knows! The snow has provided you with a thorough disguise.

5. Since the snow has trapped you at home with nothing to do, you have plenty of time to post status updates on Facebook about how you're stuck at home with nothing to do.