The Conversation Between Me and My Four Year Old Son On The Way Home From A Birthday Party Last Night

Me: Did you have fun at the party?

E: Yes. When are we going to go to the North Pole?

Me: Well, we can't go to the North Pole. Santa's getting ready for Christmas, and we would distract him.

E: We can help!

Me: Oh no, only elves can help Santa.

E: We can be elves!

Me: That would be cool, but God created us to be people, not elves.

E: He made people to be people and elves to be elves?

Me: Yep.

E: And puppies to be puppies and babies to be babies?

Me: Yep.

E: What about buildings?

Me: Well, God gave people the abilities to make buildings.

E: Which ones did you make?

Me: Er, none of them. I haven't made any buildings. Some people make buildings, not all people.

E: Who made Chuck E. Cheese's building?

Me: I don't know.

E: I want to build a building.

Me: Well, when you are a grown up you can.

E: Okay. When are we going to go bowling?

Me: I don't know--maybe sometime soon. That would be fun.

E: But it might be too loud.

Me: Nah, it's not too bad.

E: Okay. But I want to go to the moon.

Me: Do you now?

E: Except aliens might eat me.

Me: What makes you think aliens eat people?

E: Because before I was born when I lived in heaven I saw an alien hide in a bag and grab a person that we don't know and eat them.

Me: Oh my goodness.

E: So I don't want an alien to eat me.

Me: I certainly understand that.

E: Mom?

Me: Yes?

E: Can we not talk any more until we get home?

Me: That will be just fine, son. Just fine.